This week has been terrifying and exciting and anticipatory and stressful and amazing, all rolled into one.
A lot of good,new things are happening or are in the process of happening or could possibly happen soon. This is wonderful. This also scares the crap out of me.
I was texting my best friend today. Our conversation went something like this:
Me: I am excited but also would like to curl up into a ball and cry right now and I have no idea why.
Best friend: Because it is bringing up issues you never fully dealt with and creating the possibility that you will have to face them!
Me :Stop knowing me so well, dammit.
Meg (the best friend) and I are extremely different in some ways. For example: She is very in tune with her emotions but would never go cliff-jumping at a dangerous water-hole where it is illegal to jump off of cliffs. I have done just that, and I would rather do it again and land my ass on a sharp, pointy rock than have to cope with my feelings. See? Different.
I’m stupidly brave when it comes to most anything. Talking to strangers? No problem. New, scary adventures? You betcha. Taking chances? Signing up for random things? Spontaneous vacations? I’m your girl! Trying out for a play when I’m not the best actress, road-tripping with new friends, swimming at a nude lake, promotional modeling in another city? Sure, sounds fun! Discussing my feelings and thoughts? Um. Hell,no.
So when a lot of great things are happening in my life and one of them involves dealing with unresolved emotions, I become one really happy girl on the verge of a nervous breakdown. It’s an interesting mix, y’all.